The LCHC Power Rankings are our rating system for the top ten people, events, stories, and trends making moves in the world of sports and culture this week. Providing as a snapshot of the current cultural landscape, the Power Rankings offer a guide to hat mattered most in the cultural zeitgeist this week. They are put together every Friday by your humble committee (of one).
1. Game 7 Hockey Over Everything – The NHL Playoffs return to the top spot on this week’s ranking on heels of two Game 7s this week and the start of the Conference Finals about the kick off on Saturday. The visibility and publicity around this year’s postseason is certainly helped by the fact that major markets like LA, Chicago and Boston are still involved, and that “Face of the Game” Sidney Crosby is captaining the favorites to raise the Cup, but more than for any other reason, hockey’s playoffs lead the pack this week because they have provided the most compelling storylines, culminating in Seabrook’s thrilling OT winner on Wednesday night. That game is a classic example of proof that sports remains the home for the most compelling drama anywhere. When sport is at its best, no other narrative device – be it scripted film, literature, or reality television – can touch the raw emotions and catharsis created by sudden-death, ‘win or go home’ sporting events. Moments like Wednesday night are why we watch, and we are all just lucky that there are even more to come in the weeks ahead.
2. The Smiths, Lost in Space – A sampling of the critical response to After Earth: “Is “After Earth” the worst movie ever made?”; “After Earth is not as bad as The Last Airbender. Yes, you heard it here first: After Earth is not as bad as one of the worst big budget films ever released.”; “There is no small irony that this sci-fi action adventure is about surviving a serious crash. The scorched earth left behind by “After Earth” is sure to leave a scar on everyone involved.” Put it this way – the critical response to this film is worse than it was to A Good Day to Die Hard. Leading to a larger question: are we just about done with Will Smith, superstar? Yes, the film will make its money back overseas where he is still a draw, but here domestically it is just about guaranteed to be a flop. The mid-90s were a very long time ago after all, and between some truly terrible films and utterly pretentious interviews, I wonder how much longer until he becomes the Action equivalent to Adam Sandler as relic of another time in our culture. There are only so many times you can go to the Graham Norton/Fresh Prince Nostalgia Well, Big Willie.
#3-10 and Honourable Mentions, after the jump…
3. In the NBA, Resistant is Futile – The Spurs could have gone on a cruise while they wait for the Eastern Conference to sort itself out, and probably would be no worse for wear if they actually did so. These NBA Playoffs have been a letdown because of all the key central figures who weren’t involved because of injury, but nonetheless we have come to a place where the three best teams in the game as well playing, and where it seems likely that the league’s Best Player and most marketable team will collide with its Best Coach, Best Point Guard, and Best Old General (who doubles as the Best Power Forward Ever). That is not a bad place to be in, even if the road to getting here was not as exciting as we would have hoped. I’ll still hold out hope that the Pacers can take Game 6 at home and put one more scare into Miami, but Spurs-Heat seems like a done deal at this point.
4. “It doesn’t matter if you win by an inch or a mile; winning’s winning.” – This is Justin Lin’s world (with assists from Vin Diesel and The Rock, of course). We are all just living in it. May The Seven Gods of Westeros bless this glorious mess of NOS and nonsense. This is the Best-Worst Franchise in Hollywood , with very knowing acknowledgement of the camp/tone/awful acting it embodies, and I applaud it for understanding and embracing ‘what it is’ (i.e. terrible, fun) better than any other series going.
5. Sergio Being Sergio – In an now-disused classification system for intelligence, the term “idiot” meant someone with an IQ of about 25 or under, or someone with the mental age of less than 3 years old. In that dated way, Sergio Garcia is not an idiot. In similarly every other way the term is used though? I think it applies. While I do not suspect Garcia to actually be a racist as well, I suppose only he really knows that. All that I can say for certain is that his Fried Chicken line proves he isn’t funny, but that he is a joke.
6. Roll On at Roland Garros – Rafa continues to roll, as does Jovanovski, while in the Ladies’ bracket Serena and Sharapova also continue to dominate. The French Open may not capture the imagination of the general public here in North America in the same way Wimbledon and the US Open do, but it goes without saying that the third most important tennis event of the year still merits our attention.
7. Proof that Zombie Shows are a No-Win Scenario – Arrested Development is back and Netflix is thrilled; the site has some of its highest usage ever, leading to them consider ordering even more episodes. Too bad the product itself is a disjointed ghost of its former self (and if anyone is really honest about it, so was Season 3). That is not to say the new episodes aren’t fun, or that they don’t have singular moments for cleverness and insight that rivals the show’s peak creatively – that is all true. But so is the fact that sometimes things that are dead should stay that way, and digging up the corpse Weekend at Bernie’s (2!) style rarely is a good idea. I’m looking at you, Veronica Mars…
8. When More is More – Behind the Candelabra is excellent. Matt Damon is as good as he’s been in years, and Michael Douglas is arguably better than he ever has been. I’d estimate that its total for Emmy and Golden Globe wins next winter will be roughly: “All Of Them”. It may be the last feature we see from one of the great directors of the last 20 years….(*Ferris Buehler-esque Waiting*)….You’re still here? What else do you need exactly? Go, get out of here. Go and watch it already.
9. Rise of Ka-El – Trailer after trailer, TV spot after TV spot, Man of Steel continues to look better with every new piece of marketing material that is realized. The Last Son of Krypton is going to rocket up these ranking in the next few weeks, and his return to the big screen is likely going to be the film event of the summer, if not the entire year (Take that with all the Fanboy-shaped salt you need).
10. (Tie) Star Trek Into Darkness; Mad Men Conspiracies – The newest voyage of the USS Enterprise continue to keep pace slightly ahead of 2009’s predecessor domestically, and while the sequel isn’t doing Tony Stark money overseas, it is still the most successfully Trek in foreign territories ever. On a completely-unrelated-but-no-less-interesting note, Mad Men has turned into Room 237 all of a sudden.
Honourable Mentions
- Not So Cruel Summer – Slowly but surely, The Summer of Kanye is coming. Whether folks enjoy his new musical direction or not (and I happen to), there is no arguing that music is more fun and more important when Yeezus is involved.
- The Internet is The Worst – There is going to be a Grumpy Cat movie. Way to go everyone. This is why we can’t have nice things.
- Expendables 3 is Basically Fan Fiction At This Point Cast – Jackie Chan. Wesley Snipes. Milla Jovovich. AND Nic Cage. The latest additions to the cast make perfect sense, and are also depressing, since they would seem to confirm that this entire franchise is not just about aging stars last grasp for relevance and fame, but now about paying for that second (or third) mortgage. That should not be a surpirse of course, but it’s still sad when life becomes such a bad cliché. Here is hoping the climax involves Nic convincing Sly to “Get in the Cage.”
- Last One Off the Titanic Wins? – The American Idol Exodus continues, and I continue to not care at all, however I’m aware that culturally it seems relevant, so this is precisely the first and last time I will dedicate a sentence to it.
- The Unfortunate PSH News – There is no punch line or clever/snarky comment to the news that Philip Seymour Hoffman was in rehab last week after developing a heroin habit over the last year. This is just sad and unfortunate; here is hoping he will be alright.
- Not Your Older Brother’s Pittsburgh Pirates – The baseball season is a long, slow slog, with many peaks and valleys; a lot can change, and a team that is red-hot now can be mired in a slump in just a few weeks. Still, it’s nice to see Pittsburgh’s recent performance suggest that they may finally be for real this year.
Low Culture, High Concept 